


Curiosity Killed the Cat (Satisfaction Brought it Back)

by Madashatters



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Iron Man - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, Friendship, Getting Together, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Platonic Relationships, Tony Has Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-31 10:41:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10897656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madashatters/pseuds/Madashatters
Summary: Loki leaves him five books, all showing Tony the same thing:His family and when he realized they were his friends. When he realized they trusted him.Why did Loki leave these for him? And why is Steve's different?--------The one where Tony is reminded that he has friends and that they care about him and also realizes that maybe Steve loves him back.





	Curiosity Killed the Cat (Satisfaction Brought it Back)

**Author's Note:**

> I had an idea and it became this somehow. I'm a sucker for meddling Loki and Tony realizing how much his friends care about him. And also realizing that Steve loves him. Apparently my canon involves sober Tony and Loki shipping stony. Hope you enjoy it! Feedback is highly appreciated!

The last time Tony slept was about 50 hours ago. He had a stroke of, usual, genius at dinner with the team and he hasn’t left his lab since. He’s also not sure if he’s seen any of them since then but based off the empty plates stationed around his workplace, they’ve seen him. He was so close to finishing it, so close, until all his tools shut off because Jarvis ruled him “unfit” to be using them. Whatever. He doesn’t need tools, he can make anything. He just needs coffee first. Tony goes toward the coffee pot he has in his lab only to find it empty. And not making more. Or turning on. “Jarvis, you can’t do this to me, bud.”

 

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean sir.” If Tony wasn’t so out of it or so in need of coffee he would’ve been proud of the sarcasm coming from his AI, as he always was when he talked to J, but his coffee.

 

“I swear J if you don’t start the coffee I’m giving you away to the lowest bidder. I mean it!” He pets the coffee pot, hoping it will coax some coffee out of it. It didn’t. He looks up at the ceiling, a bad habit he got from Steve, and gives his best puppy eyes.

 

“I’m sorry to say sir but puppy eyes will not get you out of this.” Tony doesn’t pout, he _doesn’t_ . “It has been approximately 51 hours and 27 minutes since you last slept which has triggered Captain Roger’s sleep protocol.” Tony tilts his head to the side, confused. _Sleep Protocol?_

 

Reading his mind, Jarvis answers. “Captain Roger’s programmed the sleep protocol for when he is away and unable to convince you to sleep. If I feel as if sir is in trouble of endangering himself I am to shut down the lab, including coffee.” Tony feels himself frown. That’s new.

 

Before Tony could start arguing with Jarvis he notices additions to his desk. Walking slowly away from the coffee pot and to his desk he saw that the new additions were five leather bound books stacked and a letter on top. Now somewhere in Tony’s mind he knows he should be worried, these came out of nowhere and he doesn’t know what they are or what they’ll do. But the scientist in him is begging him to examine them. As he stared at the books from afar the desire to see what they are grew stronger. It would be considered rude to not at least read the letter right? And Tony Stark is the farthest thing from rude.

 

 _I believe these books would be_ intriguing _to someone of your caliber, Stark. What is that saying your people love to say? Ah yes: curiosity killed the cat. Seems appropriate, don’t you think? Good luck._

__-Loki_ _

 

 

Learning that the books were a gift from Loki probably should’ve worried Tony more, especially with the subtle threat thrown into the letter. But Tony was heavily sleep deprived, Steve was nowhere to stop him, and he remembers Thor saying something about Loki “getting better,” so he did what any person would do in his place.  He moved the letter to the side and started examining the books. The one on top was the thinnest, it could almost be confused as a journal. It was a purple so dark it almost seemed black with scratches and marks littering the leather. The title was written in bulky, chicken scratch handwriting colored white so it could jump from the purple. _Clint_ . Tony’s brow furrowed because that was Clint’s handwriting perfectly. _Was this his diary or something?_ The idea of having Clint’s diary in his hands was too good for Tony to pass up on, so he immediately sat down and opened it to start reading. Then everything went black.

 

\----

 

 _It was late at night. The Avengers were all sleeping and Tony was stuck in the kitchen looking, just looking, at the glass of whiskey he poured for himself. It had been a rough couple of weeks, the Avengers were still learning how to live together and to some degree Tony. Rhodey left, Tony miscalculated and wasn’t able to save someone from being crushed during a mission, Stark Industries stock went down, the nightmares just wouldn’t stop and really Tony could use a drink. Tony_ needed _a drink. But the small voice in the back of his head was flashing and ringing alarm bells because it knew, Tony knew, that he worked hard to be sober. Was he really willing to throw the past three years down the drain just because he was having a bad day? But before he could take the glass and pour it down the sink the kid’s face flashed before his eyes, full of terror and too far, why is he so far? Tony could get to him, he could he just needs to- Tony shakes his head and looks at the glass in his head._ Bottoms up _as he cheers to no one and goes to drown in his mistakes. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Tony’s pretty sure he’s not so out of it that he’s hearing things so he put down the glass and turns to the voice that just entered the kitchen. “Hood, shouldn’t you be sleeping? You need all the beauty rest you can get.”_

 

 _Clint doesn’t respond to his quip and heads toward Tony’s glass. He picks it up and immediately pours it into the sink. Before Tony can say anything, Clint grabs the bottle Tony left out and pours that into the sink as well. Tony is left to do nothing but watch as his temptation is forced away from him. A part of him was disappointed, after coming to his decision he was excited to feel the numbness of being drunk again but another part of him was glad Clint did it, though the question is why. He looks up to the culprit about to ask when Clint just shrugs. “At the last gala I stole your champagne because I was too lazy to get my own. Imagine my surprise when all I tasted was some fizzy apple juice.” He goes towards the fridge and opens the freezer. “Let’s just say that made me curious because that trick is taught at AA meetings, but that couldn’t be the case right? Not Tony Stark, playboy, partygoer, and from what I’ve heard, a fun drunk.” He pulls out two cartons of ice cream from the back of the freezer and places one in front of Tony. Tony’s shocked to see his favorite flavor sitting in front of him. “Then we moved in and I was able to actually watch your actions. From what I saw you’ve been sober for a couple years?” He looks at Tony as he places a spoon next to the cartoon waiting for an answer. Tony, surprisingly enough, finds himself nodding. “That’s what I thought, what with the fake sips of beer and all. Anyway the past couple of weeks have been tough on you and I wouldn’t have said anything if I hadn’t noticed your tick.” The surprise Tony felt must’ve showed on his face because Clint started to laugh “Yes, Tony you have a tick. A well hidden one, but it’s there if you look. So I bought some ice cream just for this moment.You were anxious at dinner so I figured tonight would be the night.” He shrugs again as if he didn’t just find out one of Tony’s biggest secret or as if he didn’t just blow Tony’s mind by insinuating he cared enough to get his_ favorite _ice cream. Clint walks toward the living room and looks back at Tony exasperated. He gets the hint and grabs the carton and spoon and follows Clint to the couch. He turns on the tv when Tony sits down, putting on his newest obsession_ Parks and Recreation _and casually eating his ice cream. Tony opens his mouth to try and say something but once again Clint beats him to it. “I’m always open for ice cream Tone, this shit’s my weakness.” And Tony loses his ability for words because Clint is helping him, Clint is telling him that he’ll be there for him in the future and Tony doesn’t doesn’t know what to do with that new information. So he settles in the couch next to Clint and starts eating his ice cream._

 

_“You owe me $500 for the whiskey.” He mumbles into his spoonful. Clint must’ve heard him however because his laugh plays over the theme song of the show and Tony can’t help but smile. Maybe this whole Avengers thing won’t be a complete failure._

 

\-------

 

_“Stark, I’m gonna need your assistance in a second.”_

 

_“Kinda busy here Legolas, please get in line behind the giant, flying ants and maybe I can fit you in.”_

 

_“I have an idea on how to stop them.”_

 

_“God help us.”_

 

_“Ha ha, you’re hilarious. Anyway I’m going to go through with it, I got the ok from Cap.”_

 

_“Have fun with that Bird Brain-ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ABOUT TO JUMP OFF THAT BUILDING!?”_

 

_“Yup, better act fast. Kinda need your participation in this plan.”_

 

_“Ok, ok I’m coming. Got Cap’s permission my as-WHY DID YOU JUST JUMP, YOU IMPATIENT ASS. I swear to God, Clint if I don’t get there in time I’m going to kill you.”_

 

_“Gonna need you to go faster here, Tone.”_

 

_“You idiot, you could’ve died.”_

 

_“Nah, I knew you’d catch me Tony. My own prince in shining armour. Now get me on your back, I gotta shoot.”_

 

_\------_

 

 _What the actual fuck._ Tony falls into the back of his chair, thankful that he sat down before he opened that. He’s not so sure he’d be able to stand after experiencing that. Whatever _that_ was. He closes his eyes and just thinks. He could be hallucinating. He can admit that having somewhat of a sleeping schedule has messed with his ability to not sleep. But it was so _real,_ Tony is good but he’s not _that_ good. If these are an actual ‘gift’ from Loki then magic is probably involved, _God does Tony fucking hate magic,_ so is it possible that those were his memories being played back to him? As Tony, thinks more about it he realizes that’s exactly what happened. He can remember everything he felt and everything he wanted to say as if it just happened when in reality it was two years ago.  Why those memories though? Obviously they had to do with Clint because it was his book and they were Tony’s memories because he opened them? Tony’s brow furrows, it doesn’t make sense for the memories to change based on the person when Loki gave this to him specifically. So that means these books are the memories of his friendships with these people? But it only showed Tony two memories.

 

Tony picked up the journal and looked at again, _really_ looked at it after everything he knows now. All the books are different, from size to cover to length. _Each friendship is different, each one has different memories._ Tony then starts to really think about their friendship. Tony and Clint only ever communicate in jokes and harsh sarcasm. It’s how they work. Late night ice cream parties have been few and far between as the years have past but they still happen, for both of them. He imagines that if he opened the book again he’d be flooded with sarcasm and brain freeze and more near death experiences. He can understand why it’s so short in length, it’s probably mostly dialogue. Tony opens his eyes and almost immediately wants to close them again because of the harsh light. He blames the sleep deprivation on why it took him so long to realize why he was shown those two memories. _The first memory was when I first realized Clint was my friend, the second was when I realized he trusted me._ And isn’t that something. He looks at the other books still stacked, waiting for him to open them and remember. He should probably stop now and find a surface to knock out on, if Steve were here he would’ve never opened the book in the first place. Are all the books going to show him the same situation? _Only one way to find out_. He reaches for the next book. That just so happen to be dark red and reads Natasha.

_________

 

 _The Avengers were invited to the premier of_ The Great Gatsby. _This isn’t their first time being invited to one of these event. Hell, ever since The Avengers were created if there was an event, they were invited. The invites, of course, were either ignored (Tony) or politely declined (Steve). But Steve remembers reading_ The Great Gatsby _before he enlisted so Tony figured the team should have a day out together. Team Bonding and all that. Fury would be proud.  It has nothing to do with the way Steve’s been acting recently. Like the world is gray and he can’t see color anymore. It has nothing to do with that. Nothing. So here they are on their way to the red carpet where a hoard of flashes and yelling await. A shuffling scientist dressed in his fanciest sweater and jeans (honestly they were lucky Bruce even came out of the lab), the all american boy looking even more amazing than usual in a fitted suit._ Nope, not following that train of thought _. The evil twins, who are trading looks of boredom and death with each other, and Tony in front of them all with his mask on and ready to keep all eyes on him. Before they get there Tony turns to half of the dark brigade. “Get Bruce inside as fast as you can.” WIthout waiting for a response he turns to the rest of them. “All you have to do is stand and look pretty then walk and look pretty. All of you can handle that I’m sure.” And with that he takes a deep breath and walks onto the carpet immediately being attacked by a storm of light. He smiles wide with his hands out and poses for their cameras, in the corner of his eye he can see Clint and Bruce making their way to the entrance. He keeps walking ready to smile and schmooze in order to get his frien-teammates out of there unscathed. As Steve and Natasha move to start walking on the carpet, Tony walks towards the screaming press to distract them._

 

_“Stark! Care to comment on your most recent breakup with Ms. Potts?”_

 

_“Will Ms. Potts still be CEO of Stark Industries?”_

 

_“How much of your fame do you owe to your father?_

 

_“Mr. Stark! Do you feel as if you are inferior to the other Avengers?”_

 

_“Are the rumours about your father true?”_

 

_“”Will you step down from Stark industries completely?”_

 

_“Do you feel you deserve this life after everything you’ve done?”_

 

_“What’s in the future for Stark Industries?”_

 

 _All these questions overlap but Tony can still hear them all and feel each one nail him further into a coffin. He heads towards the one who asked about Stark Industries future seeing as that one seemed the most innocent. He answers the interviewer’s questions flawlessly, easily dazzling him with a smile anytime it seemed he was getting too close to a topic Tony wasn’t going to talk about. He was obviously new to the job, not a vulture yet like the others. Speaking of which, before the rookie could say “Thank you” to Tony, an interviewer Tony was sure was on the other side of the crowd pushed him away and looked directly into Tony’s eyes, determined. Her cameraman quickly following from the left._ This should be fun. _“Seems like someone’s in a rush.” He closes his mouth into a smile. Always smiling. “Mr. Stark, recently a rumour that your father, Howard Stark, was abusive towards you has come out. Do you have anything to say towards this rumour?” She then thrusts her microphone into his face and gives him a smile that would be terrifying if she wasn’t an ant compared to Black Widow. Tony can feel his smile becoming more strained._

 

_”Rumours are rumours sweetheart, nothing concrete there.” He waves it off as if he can’t feel the memories banging on the wall in his mind._

 

_“You never answered the question Mr. Stark, are you hiding something?”_

 

_“I have nothing to hide and I answered your question. Just not with the answer you wanted. Now, I must be off I have a movie to see.”_

 

 _“One more question Mr. Stark, do you feel you are worthy to be fighting on the same team as_ Captain America _after your_ history _.” For some reason after she asks that question all Tony can feel is the pain from Howard not finding Cap after “_ It’s a good lead this time, we’ll find him” _and isn’t that pleasant. Before he can respond, in a very old Tony Stark manner, a shadow passes in front of him with a small touch to his arm and Natasha is in front of him in the blink of an eye._

 

_“Jessica ma’am,” The sudden caution in her voice almost makes Tony laugh.  Almost. “Would you like to be interviewed Ms. Romanoff?”_

 

_“No, I'm not here to be interrogated. I'm here to retrieve Tony, it's almost time for the movie.” Natasha turns to Tony and if Tony didn't know her and what she could do, he'd say the look she was giving him was almost sympathetic. But that's not possible._

 

 _“Cut the camera Dylan, the killer wouldn't talk about his daddy issues.” Dylan looks annoyed but not surprised by what Jessica just said and turns to follow her to her next victim. Then Tony looks to Natasha ready to joke about her missing him when he sees her face._ Uh oh. _Tony knows that face and nothing good comes to the person who caused it. Ever._ _She turns quickly and grabs Jessica’s sleeve before she can leave. “What did you just say?”_

 

_“Natasha we should probably be going and not almost assaulting press.” To no one's surprise he is ignored._

 

 _“You can't be mad at me for speaking the truth. He’s a killer and deserved everything he got.” Tony can't stop the flinch that comes from hearing those words and Natasha doesn't miss it. If anything, it fuels her. Jessica is showing very stupidly placed bravery and if Tony wasn't worried about making a scene he'd might say he was impressed. Might. Natasha’s grip visibly tightens and she pulls Jessica in closer. Jessica's eyes fill with fear and the smile that causes nightmares takes over Natasha’s face and she becomes Black Widow in the blink of an eye. She pulls the reporter closer and whispers directly in her ear. Tony can't hear what she's saying but Jessica's face visibly deflates and all that's left is terror. Natasha pulls back and give her another shark smile before turning to Tony and giving him an actual smile._ What? _She takes his arm and pulls him toward the entrance. By the time they've sat down with the group and the movie has started, Tony is still confused. He looks to Natasha and she senses it without even looking at him, she quickly pats his arm and leaves it there. Tony looks at the hand on his arm and relaxes into the chair finally paying attention to the movie. When Black Widow says she's your friend, there's no denying it. Even Tony knows that._

 

_\---------_

_“Are you about to kill me?”_

 

_“No, Tony.”_

 

_“Are you sure? Because you’re awfully close right now and I have a feeling you only get this close to people when you’re about to kill them.”_

 

_“I’d never kill you Tony. I’m just... not feeling well today.”_

 

_“Oh wait you’re sick? I didn’t know that was possible for you.”_

 

_“I’m not sick I’m just not feeling well, there’s a difference.”_

 

_“Nat, I can feel the heat coming off of you.”_

 

_“Shut up.”_

 

_“Burrowing further into me side isn’t going to make you disappear Nat. Did you take any medicine?”_

 

_“Mmnph.”_

 

_“I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you through the layers of my clothes.”_

 

_“No…”_

 

_“C’mon, I’m making you some soup and getting you some medicine.”_

 

_“Tony?”_

 

_“Yea Nat?”_

 

_“Thanks.”_

 

_“Anytime kitten.”_

 

_“Ok, ok no nicknames got it. I’ll be back with my warmth, soup, and medicine.”_

 

_\--------_

 

“Sir, do you think it’d be in your best interest to stop reading and go to sleep?”

 

“Nope” Tony then reaches for the next book. It’s dark green and the actual size of a book. Tony quickly scans the cover to confirm that Bruce is next. He’s far too curious now to stop opening these. _Why did Loki leave these for him?_ Tony opens Bruce’s book searching for the answer.

 

________

 

_Tony was a mess.  He was getting even less sleep than usual and even when he did sleep it was plagued by nightmares. Most of his nights that week consisted of staring at the ceiling of his room, slowly blinking and wishing the heat would actually reach his body. No one from the team directly asked him what was wrong, of course, if they did he can’t exactly remember.  They worried the way they usually do, from afar and with no comments. The way Tony prefered it.  Most days. Today, however, Steve decided the cure to all his problems would be to drag Tony out of his cocoon of blankets and sit him at the breakfast table. At this point in the week, Tony was basically unresponsive, this being obvious by Steve throwing him over his shoulder and Tony not saying a word. The table was full of concerned faces. Ranging from Natasha’s small eyebrow twitch to Bruce’s stress cooking. Tony didn’t see any of this._

 

_“He seems uglier than usual.” This resulted in Clint getting a slap from Natasha and a glare from Steve. They looked over to Tony only to see no change in his state. “Ow, you know what I mean, look at him. He’s dead on his feet.”_

 

_Natasha nods but doesn’t apologize for hitting him. Steve replaces his glaring for staring worryingly at Tony. “Does anyone know why he’s like this?” Steve looks up hopefully, Jarvis always has an answer._

 

_Before Jarvis can respond, Bruce is talking from his place at the stove. “It’s been a year since our first fight.” He puts a plate of pancakes on the table, watching as his teammates fight for them without making it obvious they are. He then returns to the table with an omelette and toast, he places it in front of Tony. “Happy Anniversary.”_

 

_“Why does he get an omelette-” Clint stops talking as soon as he sees that Tony’s eyes are clearer. “Never mind.”_

 

_Everyone then watches as Tony slowly starts to smile. He picks up a fork and looks to Bruce. “Thanks bruciebear.”_

 

_Bruce smiles as a response. Tony feels warmth for the first time in days as he takes a bite of his food, glad to have a Bruce understand him._

 

_\------------_

 

_“Brucie, I need you to calm down for me.”_

 

_“Obviously that’s not happening right now Tony.”_

 

_“Just breathe.”_

 

_“I am breathing.”_

 

_“Well breathe better then.”_

 

_“You’re terrible at this, you know that right.”_

 

_“Hey, I’m not the one who called me down here. Steve would’ve been a way better choice.”_

 

_“He would’ve just barked orders at me.”_

 

_“I’m not doing any different.”_

 

_“You’re arguing with me.”_

 

_“Still don’t see how that’s better.”_

 

_“I’m used to this.”_

 

_“Is this your way of telling me we argue too much? Is this your it’s not you, it’s me talk?”_

 

_“Tony-”_

 

_“I like to think that we argue so much because we’re a lot alike, me and you. I mean, yea, I don’t turn into a raging green hulk when I’m angry but we have science in common. Y’know, science bros.”_

 

_“Tony-”_

 

_“And you make amazing food and you somehow know all my favorite foods even though I’ve never told you them and if you were to break up this friendship, is that the term?, then it’s probably be more of a it’s you, not me kind of deal.”_

 

_“Tony!”_

 

_“Yes green giant?”_

 

_“I’m not turning green anymore.”_

 

_“Oh.”_

 

_“Yea, oh.”_

 

_“I’ll just, um, go.”_

 

_“I’m making dinner tonight, Your favorite, don’t be late or I’ll send Steve.”_

 

_“I’ll be there.”_

______

 

“Sir, it would be smart to go to sleep-”

 

“Daddy’s busy Jarvis.” He grabs the next book. He can just read the name Thor on the front. _This should be fun._

_____

 

_Thor has been on Earth for several months now. He says it’s because he wishes to spend time with his newly found comrades and his beloved. Tony says it’s because he wants to get away from family drama. Both are probably true. With his new found human life, Thor has many questions, which is to be expected. Human life is confusing as all shit, Tony has told this to Thor many times. What Tony finds weird is that anytime Thor has a question, he goes to Tony._

 

_“Brother Anthony!” He marches into the common room with a smile on his face and arms open wide, as if he was giving the room a hug._

 

_“Yes, Brother Thor?” Thor’s smile somehow gets bigger after hearing Tony respond that way._

 

_“What are the two wheeled vehicles I see people transporting on called?” He sits next to Tony on the bigger couch, leaning forward eager for an answer. Tony is happy to comply._

 

_“Are they skinny two wheeled vehicles or loud two wheeled vehicles?” Tony puts down his tablet, giving Thor his full attention._

 

_“I am talking of the skinny ones. You once mentioned that Steve’s motorcycle needed work done, is that the loud one you speak of?” Tony is surprised Thor remembered him mentioning that. It was a long time ago and only in passing._

 

_“Yup, good job big guy.” Thor nods in understanding, a smile still on his face. “The skinny two wheeled ones are called bicycles, bikes for short.”_

 

_“Bicycles, are they just a more silent version of the motorcycle?” his face scrunches up in a way Tony can only describe as adorable. An adorable, confused puppy. Tony decides this is the perfect description for Thor._

 

_“No, in fact the motorcycle was designed after the bicycle. It’s used as transportation as you’ve seen. Mainly for people who can’t afford a car or people who want to exercise.” Thor nods again, satisfied with Tony’s answer. Before Thor can leave, Tony moves to ask his own question._

 

_“Why do you always come to me when you have questions?” Tony is genuinely curious about this, Thor could ask anybody. Hell, his girlfriend is one of the smartest people Tony knows, he can go to her with all of these questions._

 

_Thor looks at him with his confused puppy look. “I enjoy listening to what you have to say. You explain it simply but not as if I am lower for not knowing.” He says it as if Tony should have known all this already. Maybe he should’ve._

 

_“You’re a god, big guy. In no world would I be higher than you. You’re incredibly smart, like I’ve told you. Human life is confusing as shit, everyone needs to ask questions every now and then.” Thor stands then, smiling still. Tony picks up his tablet again, ready to go back to work._

 

_“Thank you brother Anthony, you truly are a great friend.” he claps Tony on the soldier as he leaves.  Tony smiles down at his tablet. Who knew one day he’d be friends with a demigod?_

 

_\-------_

 

_“Brother Anthony!”_

 

_“Yes, brother Thor, how may I help you this fine day?”_

 

_“You are in great spirits today, are you not?”_

 

_“Indeed I am Thor, whatcha got for me today big guy?”_

 

_“I do have a question for you Anthony but it is not one to do with Midgardian life.”_

 

_“Oh?”_

 

_“Would you like to know more about Asgard?”_

 

_“Well that’s an automatic yes, but what are you talking about?”_

 

_“Those who work in SHIELD are asking many questions about my people.”_

 

_“Yes, they do that. It’s a rather annoying habit of theirs.”_

 

_“Indeed. I do not completely trust those who work there but I have trusted you with my life on many occasions and shall continue to do so. I hope to share the stories of my people with you, if you’re willing to listen.”_

 

_“I’m always here to learn more,big guy. Come, sit down with old man Stark”_

 

_“I was not aware you were that old Anthony”_

 

_“Ha ha Thor. Now, I was promised story time.”_

 

_“Of course-”_

__________

 

Tony slumps back into his chair, he gets it now. At least, he gets what the books are showing him. The memories come in pairs. He remembers each one, they were in his perspective after all. Though Bruce’s first memory is kind of hazy to him. He remembers what he felt at each point of those memories. The first ones had the same things in common, it’s when he realized that the Avengers were more than just people he forced to live with him. It’s when he realized that they were actually his friends. The second memory was when he realized that they actually _trusted_ him. He closes his eyes, rubbing his temples. He can feel a headache coming, either from the thinking or the sleep deprivation he’s not sure. Probably a combination of both. _Why the hell did Loki even send these to him?_ He opens his eyes, glaring at the last book on his desk. He should really get some sleep. But the last book is _Steve’s_ and Tony is a man driven by curiosity. He sighs and leans forward, slumping over the book. He opens it, hoping to find some kind of answer.

_______

 

 _He had been in the lab for a couple days. He wasn’t avoiding humanity, really he wasn’t. So maybe he was ignoring Rhodey’s calls and maybe things have gone down hill since Pepper broke it off, and maybe_ , _just_ maybe _, he was really debating drinking the coffee Dummy made for him. But that didn’t mean anything.  He was just working. On nothing. Tony’s internal monologue is interrupted by a plate being set in front of him. Tony follows the arm in front of him to see Steve looking at him with a small smile. “Howdy Cap, Howsit goin?”_

 

_Steve shakes his head, amused. “Come on Tone, you haven’t come up for air in a while. I wanna make sure you’re actually eating all the food we’re leaving for you.”_

 

_Tony looks around to find empty plates in different places around the lab. He doesn’t remember people bringing them down, or eating them for that manner. He points lazily at the closest dish, “I ates it.” He’s so tired. He looks up to Steve, blinking slowly, “Dummy put oil in my coffee again.”_

 

_Steve’s face changes to an emotion Tony can’t quite place, “I think you need sleep way more than you need food right now.” Tony finds himself nodding without being aware of it._

 

_Steve decides that Tony isn’t going to be getting up on his own, to which he is right. He lifts Tony from his chair, throwing an arm around his waist, Tony is rational enough to throw an arm around Steve’s shoulders to help. They walk to the elevator, Tony practically leaning on Steve the entire way. As they wait for the elevator to get to his floor, Tony falls asleep against Steve._

_Tony open his eyes, drowsily, seeing Steve’s face pulling away from him. Steve pulls the cover over Tony, he turns to his side, getting comfortable.  “She left me Cap.”_

 

_Steve almost didn’t hear him, his voice now muffled in the pillows. If Tony’s eyes were open, he would’ve seen a look of sadness cross Steve’s face. “I know, Tony. It’ll be ok.” Steve pushes some hair out of Tony’s face, in his tired state, Tony leans into it._

 

_“Whendu start callin me Tony?” Steve is taken aback by his question, he straightens himself, smoothing Tony’s covers._

 

_“You’re my friend Tony, you’re only Stark when you’ve done something incredibly stupid but heroic.” Tony smiles, falling back into his bed._

 

_“S’nice, I like it.” Steve walks towards the door, looking back as Tony finally knocks out._

 

_“Me too Tony.” He closes the door, smiling._

 

_\---------_

 

_“Oh captain, my captain!”_

 

_“Yes,oh shellhead, my shellhead?”_

 

_“Get dressed, we’re going to the carnival.”_

 

_“I’m already dressed?”_

 

_“Good then, let's go!”_

_…._

 

_“Why did you bring me here Tony?”_

 

_“Because carnivals are fun and we need to have fun.”_

 

_“That doesn’t make sense, we could’ve done anything and it would’ve been fun.”_

 

_“Shhh, I am teaching you the way of badly made carnival rides and rigged carnival games.”_

 

_“Pleasegetyourfingeroffmymouth.”_

 

_“Of course. Now come on, I wanna see if you can con the con artists out of all their stuffed animals.”_

 

_“You’re going to take all the ones I win, aren’t you”_

 

_“You know me well handsome. This way”_

_…..._

 

_“Tony, let me carry some of those for you.”_

 

_“No, they are all mine, I must take care of them all.”_

 

_“The blue bear is falling.”_

 

_“Fuck, Steve catch it, quick!”_

_……_

 

_“Thanks for taking me out today, Tony. I had fun.”_

 

_“See, you gotta trust me sometimes. I have good ideas every now and then.”_

 

_“I trust you all the time, Tony.”_

 

_“Details.”_

 

_“You have whip cream on your face from your milkshake.”_

 

_“Oh where?”_

 

_“I got it.”_

 

_“...”_

 

_“You ok, Tony?”_

 

_“Uh, yea. Thanks Cap. You done with your burger? I’m about ready to head home.”_

__________

 

Tony was confused again. That last memory wasn’t when he realized Cap trusted him. It was when he realized that he had feelings for Steve. _Romantic_ feelings. _Why the hell did it show him that?_ He stares at the book, hoping it will answer all the questions he has. Somehow, staring at the book actually did help Tony realize something. With every book he had opened them at the beginning, he started at the first page for each one. Which made sense with the memories he was shown. Tony grabs Steve’s book again, thumbing to somewhere in the middle, and opens it. He doesn’t hear the notification from Jarvis.

 

______

 

 _It’s team movie night. Natasha,Clint, and Bruce are sitting on the larger seat, her feet in Clint’s lap while leaning against Bruce. A bowl of popcorn in Natasha’s hands. She’s glaring at Clint as he attempts to tickle her. Bruce is smiling at their antics. Thor is offworld, something about_ frost giants _and_ Loki isn’t behaving _. Tony isn’t surprised anymore. They picked a movie they’ve seen a million times but can’t find it in themselves to stop. Tony and Steve are on the loveseat. He’s comfortable, his head in Steve’s lap. They’re_ cuddling _. Steve has his hand in Tony’s hair, petting him into unconsciousness. Tony is trying his best to stay awake, he has to yell at the movie for it’s fake science. Tony has a tired smile on his face, he looks happy. Steve is looking at him more than the movie at this point. Studying his face in the light of the tv. Memorizing it. No one is looking at them weirdly, it’s a normal occurrence. The movies keeps playing and Tony falls asleep, Steve keeps petting his hair._

______

 

Tony is overcome by a feeling of want. He _wants_ what he saw to be real. Is it a fantasy or is it a future memory? Will him seeing it somehow change the outcome of that ever happening? “I’m too tired for this.” His head falls against the table, sighing as the cold spreads against his forehead.

 

“I agree, c’mon shellhead, it’s time for bed.” Tony sits up so fast, the chair moves back with him. Steve is standing in the entrance of the lab with a tired, affectionate smile. Tony finds himself waving stupidly at him. Steve shakes his head, walking towards him. “A little birdie told me someone hasn’t been sleeping again.”

 

Tony pets the new upgrade for the Iron Man suit he was working on before Jarvis child locked him. “You had my son betray me.” Tony isn’t pouting, he’s not.

 

“It was a necessary evil, we’re just looking out for you, c’mon now.” Steve lifts him from his chair, an arm under Tony’s neck and another under his knees, forgoing any attempt to make it look as if Tony could function by himself. Tony doesn’t shuffle closer to Steve’s chest, really, he doesn’t.

 

They make it to Tony’s room and Steve goes to lie him on the bed. This can be done out of habit for both of them. “Loki lef me books and the were s’weird, Idonknow why he did but i didn’ die so yay.” Steve chuckles, pulling the covers over Tony, just like he did in the memory. But this time, Tony knows the look on Steve’s face, he saw it on himself anytime he talked about or looked at Steve. “You have s’pretty eyes.”

 

“Thank you, Tony” He goes to pull away but Tony grabs his shirt with the speed a man as sleep deprived as him should not have.

 

“I like you allot steve.”

 

Steve smiles, “I like you too, Tony.” He manages to pull away from Tony’s grasp. Tony fell into the comfort of his bed, still trying to get his message through to Steve.

 

“Noooo, s’not friend like. I wanna take youonadate.” His words were too muffled, Steve couldn’t completely understand him.

 

“We’ll talk tomorrow, Tony. Get some sleep.” When the only response gets from Tony is a heavy sigh, Steve leaves the room to unpack from his mission.

_______

 

When Tony wakes up, he immediately wishes he could go back to sleep. By some miracle, he remembered everything that happened the day before. This means he remembers all the things he said to Steve and isn’t that embarrassing. Then he remembers the books and the glimpse in the future he saw, if that was even it. He remembers the look on Steve’s face as he watched him fall asleep, it matched the look Steve gave him when he came home to find Tony sleep deprived and a mess. Tony gets up and goes to shower. He has a plan, it will probably backfire but it’s a plan, nonetheless.

_______

 

“Steve let’s go out and get some breakfast.” He barges into the common room, exuberating confidence. Natasha and Steve are the only ones in the room. _At least if this fails, only Natasha will know._

 

“Tony, it’s three in the afternoon.” Steve looks at him with an amused smile.

 

“Ok, then let’s go and get some lunch.” Tony realized too late that they do this all the time. There’ll be no sign to Steve that this is Tony’s way of asking him out.

 

“Sure, let me just get my wallet.” Steve gets up from the couch and moves to leave to find his wallet. Tony panics a little inside, Natasha raises an eyebrow.

 

“No, it’s fine. I’ll pay.” Natasha has moved on to smirking at Tony. He tries to only look at Steve, who is looking very confused. Tony hasn’t offered to pay since the first time they went out to eat.

 

“Tony, we’ve talked about this. You’re not going to pay for me.” Tony sighs, this isn’t going the way he planned.

 

“Ok yea but this isn’t like our other times going out.” Natasha definitely knows what’s going on now. Tony glares at her, she winks back.

 

“Why not?” Steve has somehow adopted Thor’s look of a confused puppy. Tony has never been this nervous to ask someone out before. _Maybe because this matters_.

 

“Because…” Tony doesn’t know what to say. Natasha gets up from her seat and walks out of the room. She rests her arm reassuringly on Tony as she does. He takes a deep breath.

 

‘Because what?” Steve is so focused on Tony, he doesn’t even notice that Natasha as left.

 

“Because this is my way of asking you on a date and I completely failed at it.” Tony says this so fast that he’s not even sure if Steve could understand what he was saying, it sounded as if it were all one word.

 

Steve looks at him, even more confused, creating a whole new look that Tony is too anxious to find a name for. “A date?”

 

“Yea, a date.” Tony walks over to Steve, pretending is he isn’t completely terrified right now. Steve looks down. When he looks back up at Tony it’s with a smile that leaves Tony starstruck.

 

“Are you saying you’re sweet on me, Shellhead?”  He steps closer to Tony, looking down at him with that same smile. Tony finds himself speechless, only able to nod. Steve places a hand on Tony’s cheek. He’s no longer nervous.

 

“It may be more than that.” Tony’s gaze flickers from Steve’s lips to his eyes. His smile is no longer taking up his face but the happiness and affection is in his eyes. Tony feels cliche to think that he could get lost, looking into Steve’s eyes.

 

“Good. Cuz I’m more than sweet on you too.” he closes the distance between them, leaning down to kiss Tony. He closes his eyes, hoping to remember this feeling forever, in case it is just a fluke. In case this is the only time he will ever feel this warmth. In case this is the only time he’ll be held as if he’s something to be cared for.

 

They separate and just look at each other. Steve with another smile, one Tony has never seen but he automatically knows is now _his_ smile. Tony looks at him with a look close to amazement. “So, that date?” Steve’s voice is filled with mischief and amusement. Tony decides he wants to hear that tone for as long as he’s allowed.

 

“Yea, I had a whole plan. Was gonna woo you.” Steve pulls back, he takes Tony’s hand in his. Tony tries not to be surprised that Steve feels the same way. That he wants this, that he wants _him._

 

“Well, we better be on our way. I was promised to be wooed.” The mischief has moved to his eyes now. Tony feels himself fall a little farther in love. Maybe one day, he’ll be able to tell him.

 

“After you, oh captain, my captain.” The hand around his tightens. They leave for their date with hidden smiles and eyes full of affections and mischief. Tony makes a mental notes to tell Thor to send Loki his thanks.

 


End file.
